#19 April 18 - July 8

 "Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning." - Winston Churchill 

My last blog was almost at the end of radiation. The boosts were so easy after the whole breast rads -just one and done. I finished all 31 rads, but not without scars. At the end, I had fairly bad burns on my collarbone and under my arm, plus lesser burns under my breast.

My radiation oncologist had a plan though. I had to wet gauze compresses three times a day with a Domeboro solution (kind of like Epsom Salts,) put the compresses over the burns and lie there for 15 minutes. They had to be really wet so the solution would run down my body. After that, I had to let the wounds air dry, then cover with Aquaphor. What a sticky, wet mess.  But my RO knew what she was doing. Just about the time I thought they would never heal, I had an almost overnight cure. Thank goodness because I was about to begin several weeks of travel, and the soaking and the drying and the stickiness were not going to be fun.

I saw my medical oncologist right before I had a short trip to California for my cousin’s memorial service, and she gave me the script for Anastrozole which is the anti-hormonal drug I will be taking for the next ten years. I sent it off to my mail pharmacy and will begin it when I return from all my trips.

I managed the flights to California just fine, wore my lymphedema sleeve as a precaution, a hat to cover my head (hair is still too short for me to feel good without a hat - this is 11 weeks PFC)

and had no ill effects. The day after I returned from California, my husband and I took off for a road trip to Texas with both the dogs. Long drive the first day which we shared, but I was still wasted by the time we stopped. My biggest problem is stamina. I shut down in the afternoon as if my gas tank has run dry.

We stopped overnight in Sikeston, Missouri, and then overnight close to Texarkana to see my husband’s sister and brother-in-law. The next day we made it to our daughter’s home south of Houston. We had our granddaughter’s band concert that night, so I slept the sleep of the dead after that. We spent another week there waiting for our grandson’s band concert, then headed north to family in DFW. We had a great time seeing lots of family, then up even further north to more family close to OKC. Finally one overnight and then we were home.

Instead of getting to rest from all this travel, I had to prepare for a colonoscopy which was necessary for two reasons: one – the diverticulitis when I was in chemo, two – it had been 10 years since the last one. One would think that modern medicine would come up with a better way than to drink that god awful stuff they make you drink, but they have not. As I posted on Facebook that day - For those of you who always thought I was full of it, I can assure you that as of right now, I am not.

The good news was that I had no polyps and when the biopsies came back, they were negative as well. Ten more years for them to come up with a better way.

I started taking the Anastrozole after I got over the colonoscopy, and watched carefully for side effects. My biggest worry was the joint and bone pain that many suffer on the AI’s (Aromatase inhibitors.) Lucky for me so far, I have had some joint stiffness in my hands in the morning, but have not noticed an increase over the osteoarthritis pain I always have in all my other joints. The other SE was an increase in hot flashes. I probably have them 15-20 times a day now. Not fun. Sometimes I actually feel one start in the soles of my feet for about 30 seconds, next thing my face is burning and sweat appears around my hair line. Then it’s gone. Hey, if it keeps me from getting a recurrence of cancer, I can deal with this.

My stamina is increasing daily. My hair is growing slowly. I did finally go to my hairdresser to get it trimmed since the neckline especially was out of control. I am getting “chemo curl” which makes it look shorter. Here it is at 16 and 22 weeks PFC.

I may just keep it grey, or I may not. Right now I’m just glad to have hair, as some of my BC sisters have found that Taxotere (one of the chemo drugs I took) can be responsible for permanent hair loss.

I have now met with both my RO and MO and do not need to see them for approximately six months. I will continue to see them for the next several years. I will have to have bone scans and blood tests for a long time  My cancer is not cured. I am NED - No Evidence of Disease. My last active “cancer” appointment is next week when I will have my port-o-cath removed! I will be seeing my breast surgeon in September for another mammogram. It will be one year since all this started.

When we get on the Breast Cancer train, we do not know the final destination. Sometimes the train is going very fast, and all we can do is hold on and hope we don't fall off. We progress to different cars during our treatments, and we hope that our journey is linear, but we know the sisters who have had to make the loop to the cars in the back again. We may eventually move into more comfortable compartments, and we can get off the train to enjoy certain stops and live our lives the way we used to for a time, but we are on this train for the rest of our lives. The general population does not know this. I did not know this before I got on the train. It's not a "battle," it's a journey.